Big Air

THE GREAT OUTDOOR GAMES!

Wow...I thought the Summer Olympics were my most favorite sporting event ever. I mean, there's swimming, diving, gymnastics, waterpolo, two kinds of volleyball, and much much more! For crying out loud, my ringtone on my cell is the olympic fanfare, I mean, I REALLY love the summer olympics.

But now...The Great Outdoor Games may have stolen my heart. Please...if you see it televised anywhere, you MUST watch. Not ONLY does it include Lumber Jacking sports (which are ALWAYS entertaining), but there's dog sports, and let me tell you, those are the BEST.

My personal favorite was called,"Big Air". Big Air, as Matt puts it, is the "Long Jump for Dogs". In Big Air, the "handlers" get the dogs (the most competitive breed, Labrador Retrievers) all riled up and hyper and just ACHING to have their toy clamped between their jaws. Then, they have to sit, lay down (optional) and stay at one end of the dock (which can be quite a challenge for them) and wait for the handler to release them. While waiting to be released, you can just see the focus in the pups' eyes as they're salvating for that toy. Once released, the dogs run (at around 25 mph according to one of the announcers) towards the other end of the dock. The handler then throws the toy (a perfect angle toss is approximately 45 degrees) just before the dog reaches the end of the dock. The dog then LAUNCHES himself (with, get this, the "Two Paw Push") off the dock in hot pursuit of that evasive toy. There's a ruler that runs alongside the pool (like the dog gives a CRAP about how far he's jumped!) and, probably because it's broadcast by ESPN, they put the infamous yellow "1st Down" line at the distance the dog's jump must clear to make it into the next round. The jump's distance is measured where the dog's hindquarters hit the water.

The timing of "the toss" is ABSOLUTELY critical. If the handler doesn't time his throw PERFECTLY, a couple of things can go wrong to spoil the distance of the jump. If the throw is late, the dog's velocity carries him ahead of the toy, causing the dog to look back and lose valuable distance. Apparently though, the real catastrophe is when the dog catches the toy mid-air. You see, when the dog catches the toy, he loses all motivation to jump any further and the distance is crap.

The announcers are a vital part to the humor of this event saying things like,"Oh, look at his GREAT extension, he really wants to make that jump count." Please, the only thing the dog wants is that damn toy! They also talk about the "Two Paw Push." Apparently, this is how you get the MAX Big Air. You see, if the dog measures his strides perfectly, he gets his "Two Paw Push" (where his hind legs thrust him into the air) right at the end of the dock for maximum distance. There's also something hillarious about the serious announcers just saying the word "paw," I don't know why, it just is.

Before yesterday, I had never heard of this Big Air sport and let me tell you, I could NOT stop laughing. There's something about the seriousness of the announcers and handlers, the salvating of the dogs, the dog crawling (where the dog is laying down and creeps forward across the dock)because they just so badly want that toy, the tails spinning behind the dogs as if it were a propeller to help them jump further, and the ears flapping like bat wings as the dogs are jumping that just cracks me up. Poor Matt, I probably annoyed the crap out of him...but I couldn't help it, it was FUNNY.

I give "Big Air" four extatic paws up.